CHAPTER 41

previously, 

i lost majed...

i couldn't believe my eyes, i actually told myself ymkn something happened to his phone. i sent a message asking him whats wrong and what happened to his phone? i was waiting for him the whole night, waiting for him but he didn't call or text or even re-invite me on his list. i sat on my room the whole night, haifa and dana they were watching some movies. i was standing next to the window lama dana came to my room,

dana: hey

me: …

dana: why you're sitting all alone?

me: i don't know

dana: we're going to watch A Walk To Remember your favorite movie

lama she said that i cried, i never cried in my whole life like this. i knew it, i knew he's not coming back because law he ran out of battery or something he would text me mn another phone but he didn't. dana was asking me what happened and why i was crying i couldn't talk or say anything, i was barely breathing. i didn't know what happened so dana decided to call him again from my phone and it was finally open bs he didn't pick up she called a hundred times but there was no answer. that just killed me the most.

she tried to calm me down and she start telling me everything will be ok lama i finally fell asleep crying.

she got up from my bed and went to my closet. she dialed his number…

majed: aloo

dana: aloo

majed: meen?

dana: dana 

majed: … 

dana: aish feek ma te7ke?

majed: …

dana: lina called you like a million times momken tgoole laish ma kent trd?

majed: …

dana: what? yalla talk?

majed: ana

dana: enta aish? enta 3malt laha delete without telling her? enta aish ma trd 3laiha? laish?

majed: …

dana: why you did that to her?

majed: 3ashan

dana: …

majed: umm

dana: aish majed? e7ke 

majed: i don't know

dana: 9aar shy between you two?

majed: la2

dana: then what?

majed: …

dana: majed! i never seen liin ketha what happened talk laish you deleted her? did you guys fight el yoom?

majed: no

dana: ok talk 3ashan afham

majed: i don't know what to say

dana: kaif you don't know? tell me the reason elle 5alak t3mel laha delete

majed: i can't 

dana: you can't?

majed: please dana tell her that i'm sorry 

dana: you're kidding?

majed: tell her that i wish her a happy life with whoever she loves

dana: she loves you *yelled*

majed: ...

dana: you are a coward

majed: i'm sorry

dana: you all just the same i thought you were different 3an your friend saud bs you all the same

majed: …

dana: 7aaywan wallah ma tes7te

majed: i love her wallah 

dana: law you love her ma t3mel ketha 

majed: i want her to be happy dana 

dana: she's happy with you! you didn't see her, she's a total mess

majed: take a good care of her w allah ywafegha ma3 elle t7bh

dana: god majed she loves you *she yelled at him again*

majed: dana promise me you you'll take care of her?

dana: you obvious don't care about her 

majed: dana

majed: you don't call her ever again you understand? bye

she hanged up the phone and came to set next to me. she was watching me while i was sleeping. i was tearing while sleeping, she couldn't handle watching me like that, throw a lot of things in one time. lama i woke i saw her lsa next to me. her face was red and i can tell she was tearing. 

dana: ha kaifk now? 

me: i can't breath

dana: its ok i'm with you

me: la tetrkeene dana 

dana: i would never do that

me: laish he deleted me? wallah ma 9aar shy 

I teared up.

dana: 5ala9 don't think about it

me: 7ata he didn't reply on my message

dana: he don't deserve you

me: i don't want anyone but him

dana: 5ala9 ertaa7e

me: t3abt dana i want to hear his voice

dana: liin i called him

me: he answered you?

dana: yea

me: laish ana ma yrd 3ly?

dana: i told you he don't deserve you 

i start crying more knowing that he answered dana w ana la2...

two weeks passed very slowly w i had to pack because we're going to america for the summer. w i didn't hear anything from majed w i didn't want to text him after calling him a million times without answering any of my calls. i didn't want to go anywhere but i have to, my whole family will go. 

haifa didn't know what happened between me and majed. she came to my room to help packing…

haifa: you packed everything you need?

me: i don't know

haifa: you need some help?

me: no

haifa: liin whats wrong? 

me: nothing *smiled*

haifa: i know you well so tell me whats wrong? you look different, you don't eat, you don't laugh, you don't go out with your friends, 3ashan el propose thing?

me: no

haifa: then what?

me: i don't want to go anywhere

haifa: you don't want to go?

me: yea i don't want

haifa: whats wrong wallah feek shy

me: what do you want now? you packed?

haifa: yea bs i came 3ashan i want some sandals 

me: ok take everything you need

haifa: ok

i just want her to drop the subject. she took everything she needs then she closed the door behind her. i sat on the edge of my bed thinking about majed, i wanted to call him but i was wondering why he did that? he told me he loves me w i'm his everything but what happened? why he left like that? without a reason. i sat there for a long hours just thinking lama dana and nouf came i didn't even feel anyone came. 

they called my name twice then i noticed them. nouf came and hugged me, i cried of course. 

she asked me what happened, like i know!

they bought a lot of junk food. dana wanted me to eat since i wasn't eating anything at all. we were sitting in my room eating chocolate ice cream with wip cream on top w i was pretending to eat. 

me: nouf

nouf: yea

me: majed yeje 3nd a5ook?

nouf: umm yea

me: …

nouf: i'll tell you something

dana: about majed? etha eewa don't talk about him 

me: ella whats wrong?

nouf: umm kent a7ke m3 da7oom w i asked him about majed

dana: you're kidding tes2ale a5ook?

nouf: ma sa2altah directly 

me: ok aish feeh?

nouf: he's going to usa

me: oh

nouf: ydres

me: …

dana: nouf 5ala9

i put down my ice cream w i got up smiling and telling them that i'm ok w there's no need for them to worry, but deep inside i was dying. i went to the bathroom and i cried silently w it hurts, it hurts to cry silently more than you cry in front of anyone. i stayed there lama dana came and asked me if everything ok. i told her everything is ok w i'll be out in a minute. i washed my face then i went back to them. 

dana: 6awalte

nouf: aish feek?

me: nothing

dana: akeed?

me: eewa 

nouf: 7naam 3ndk

dana: yea we decided that al7een

me: not tonight, lsa i didn't pack 

dana and nouf looked at each other.

nouf: we're going to sleep here, like it or not

dana: yea

they laughed w i was barely smiling. 

me: ok fine

the reason why i didn't want them to sleep at my house because i've been crying every night to sleep. i knew that i'll cry even when dana and nouf around bs i'll cry silently and it hurts, that's why i didn't want them here so i can cry and not feel more pain inside. 

the summer passed very slow. yes the summer passed very slow not just the summer, everyday of my life passed very slow without majed. we went to california that summer, we stayed mostly in malibu and every night i wear his cardigan and go set on the beach thinking of him. i couldn't take him out of my mind. we only stayed together for 10 months and i loved him like i was born to love him, to everything about him. he understands me, care about me, he makes me laugh when i don't want to and most important he makes me feel happy and special and he loves me, i know he loves me but i don't know what happened and why he left and every time i think of that i tear up.

i've waited everyday to hear something from majed but i didn't. 

i gave mama my final answer about faisal and she replied on them once i told her...